


esther

by worstgirl



Series: esther [1]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Maria Heere is a Bitch, Past Child Abuse, bro boyf riends, deere bc i’m trash, esther doesn’t deserve this, esther is a bean, jeremy gets mad, jeremy’s got a half-sister, mentions of child abuse, minor homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-15 03:26:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18490366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/worstgirl/pseuds/worstgirl
Summary: The phone call came in the middle of a Saturday afternoon, when everything seemed to be looking up. Of course, it all came crashing down with a burning, fiery explosion, in the words of his mother.“Jeremiah, I want you to come over for dinner.”~~~or, jeremy meets his half sister.





	esther

The phone call came in the middle of a Saturday afternoon, when everything seemed to be looking up. Of course, it all came crashing down with a burning, fiery explosion, in the words of his mother.

 

“Jeremiah, I want you to come over for dinner.” 

 

He hung up. She tried again.

 

“I want you to meet your little sister.”

 

Silence.

 

“Her name is Esther, and she really wants to meet you, and so does Garrett—“

 

“You want me to meet my replacement?”

 

Now it was his mother’s turn to be silent. “Look, Jeremiah, you’re being irrational. Esther is nothing of the sort. I would have visited—“

 

“I’m being irrational?  _ I’m  _ being irrational?” Jeremy let out a bitter sounding laugh. “Oh, really? Like you would have treated me like a good mother? Like you wouldn’t have left? Like you wouldn’t have abu-“

 

“Jeremiah.” Her voice was sharp. “Listen to me.”

 

“No! I’m not going to— you- you left, okay? You left me, and dad, and I was  _ twelve.  _ I’m not going to just-“

 

“Sunday. 4:30. Be there, I’ll text you the address.” Then the line went dead, and Jeremy was left staring at his phone screen, wishing he could throw his phone across the room. 

 

Instead, he called his boyfriend. Jake didn’t pick up, and Jeremy remembered that he had practice on Saturdays. Besides, he wasn’t about to explain to him about his mother- Jake was worried enough about him as it was, between the Squip and Chloe and everything. Throwing his abusive mother onto the pile of already traumatic issues was not the best idea. He groaned, before finally texting Michael.

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: the bitch called

 

slushee_slut: chloe??

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: no, the bitch without redeeming qualities.

 

slushee_slut: oh

slushee_slut: OH

slushee_slut: what did she want??

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: she wants me to come over for dinner

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: to meet her new husband and daughter

 

slushee_slut: the universe let her have another kid??

slushee_slut: maybe you should go just to rescue her

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: i just don’t know what to do

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: i don’t want to go meet my replacement

 

slushee_slut: okay well

slushee_slut: if you decide to go i’ll drive you and stick around if you need a getaway car

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: thanks michael ur the best

 

slushee_slut: i know

 

InsertCoolUsernameHeere: i take it back

 

slushee_slut: >:0

 

And that was how Jeremy found himself sitting in the passenger seat of Michael’s beat up P.T. Cruiser, staring at the picturesque house in the middle of the cul-de-sac. 

 

“You’re completely sure this is her house.” Michael asked, leaning against the steering wheel and glancing over at Jeremy. If possible, Michael held even more of a grudge against Jeremy’s mother than Jeremy himself. 

 

“That’s… what the address says.” Jeremy tried to stop his hands from shaking, pressing his sweaty palms against his jeans. He felt like he was a little boy again, curled in fear under his bed, waiting for the monster to come and drag him out. “I’m— I’m sure it’ll be f-fine, right? It’s just… she wouldn’t dare do anything to me in front of her kid. Right?” He hated how his voice quivered. 

 

“Yeah. You’ll be fine.” Michael’s hand was gentle on his shoulder, and Jeremy took a deep breath, unbuckling his seatbelt.

 

With a small, nervous sounding laugh, Jeremy opened his car door. “Well, uh, if I die, give Jake my love, and you get my video game console.”

 

“You’re not gonna die, drama queen.” Michael rolled his eyes, before pushing Jeremy gently out the door. “I’ll be here if you need me. Promise.”

 

A twinge of regret made Jeremy’s stomach turn. Michael was helping him, being so kind to him, and for what? Because Jeremy had abandoned him— he pushed that out of his brain. That was in the past. He wasn’t going to do it ever, ever again. “Okay. See you in a little bit.” He forced himself to sound casual as he walked up the driveway.

 

His finger hovered over the doorbell. What if this was the wrong house? What if his mother didn’t want him there anymore? What if his step-father hated him? What if the kid was a total brat? He pressed his finger to the button, his heart pounding, and he could tell his face was flushed from anxiety. 

 

From inside the house came a squeal— a little girl’s squeal, and then a small voice calling out, “I’ll get it, I’ll get it!” And then the door flew open, and it took Jeremy a second to process the tiny arms wrapping around his knees. “Jewemy!” 

 

Jeremy gave a frantic glance over his shoulder, and he couldn’t quite see Michael’s face, but he knew what it looked like— amusement, mixed with worry. Then he looked down at the little girl wrapped around his legs. Or, more accurately, at the mass of dark brown curls and the bright purple dress wrapped around his legs. “I- uh-“ 

 

Then she was there, pulling the girl away, and again there was that sick feeling in his stomach. “Hey- Mo- Maria.” He said, voice a bit shaky, and wary, as if daring her to tell him to call her ‘Mother,’ or worse, ‘Mom.’ 

 

“Jeremiah.” She said, in her usual cold tone. She looked as she always had— dark brown curly hair, bright blue eyes, pale skin. Almost identical to Jeremy, minus the freckles, and her thinness was more graceful and less lanky. Jeremy hated how similar they looked.

 

His attention was drawn away by the little girl tugging at the sleeve of his shirt, and he looked down into her dark brown eyes and his heart positively melted. “Hey.” He said, with a small smile, before he awkwardly knelt on one knee by the little girl, making their heights about the same. “You must be Esther, right?” 

 

The girl nodded quickly— she looked a lot like her mother. Her eyes were dark, sure, but he could already tell that she would grow up to be her— no,  _ their  _ mother’s carbon copy. With dark curls, pale skin, and a sprinkling of freckles, she pretty much looked like the cutest kid alive in that moment, and it was helped by a lopsided smile. “Uh-huh! And you’we Jewemy!”

 

“Esther, what did we say about your ‘r’s?” Maria scolded the girl, and Jeremy was vividly reminded of her scolding him about his stutter. He swallowed that down, focusing on the little girl in front of him. 

 

“Sow- Sorry.” Esther said, and Jeremy felt a pang of remembrance in his heart. He shook that off. Maybe she was better— but as it was going, Jeremy doubted it. 

 

“How old are you?” He asked the little girl in front of him, and he melted. God, did this girl have to be so adorable? 

 

“I’m five an’ a half!” Esther said excitedly, and by Jeremy’s math… fantastic. It had taken his mom barely a year to replace his dad and him. He shoved that away. Goddamnit, brain, why did he have to think those things? “What ‘bout you?” 

 

Jeremy blinked down at her, before giving her a grin. “I’m eighteen.” And then the girl’s mouth dropped open in awe as she looked at him. 

 

“You’re so  _ old.”  _ Jeremy couldn’t help but laugh at that, ruffling her hair— he was vividly reminded of his dad. God, he wasn’t sure how he felt with picking that habit up from him, but Esther didn’t seem to mind, giggling. 

 

“I’m not that old, Es.” The nickname came easily to him, and he could see Maria stiffening out of the corner of his eye. All the more reason to use it. Then another pair of feet, and a cough. 

 

Jeremy looked up quickly to see a man there, with sandy blonde hair and the same dark eyes as Esther. Other than the slight freckles, there was no similarity between him and Jeremy’s dad. Whereas Jeremy’s dad was decently tall, and not exactly the thinnest, or the most conventionally attractive, this man was thin and tall and looked handsome. Him and Maria were a match in attractive human land. Jeremy stood quickly, realizing how much taller the other was. 

 

“Hi, I’m Garrett. Maria’s told me a lot about you.” He stuck out a hand, and Jeremy shook it. The guy’s handshake was firm, and his hands reminded Jeremy’s a bit of Jake’s, like he’d played football in high school. He sounded kind, but Jeremy was still on edge.

 

“Has she now?” He forced himself not to stutter— a reflex when around his mother. “Like wh-“

 

“Esther, why don’t you show Jeremy your room?” Maria interrupted, and the five year old perked up, grabbing Jeremy’s sleeve and pulling him towards the stairs. Jeremy stumbled after her, looking back in time to see Maria shooting Garrett a glare. 

 

Then he was distracted by the little girl tugging on his arm again. “C’mon, Jeremy!” Jeremy followed her to a small room down a hallway. The walls were pale purple, covered with pink butterfly decals. With the various colours spread throughout, it kind of looked like a unicorn threw up in there. 

 

“It’s, uh, really pretty.” He said, kind of unconvincingly. But Esther didn’t seem to care, only pulling him to item after toy after doll and showing him. At one point, she got to a stuffed bear with another bear next to it, and another smaller one in the middle. She frowned at it. 

 

“Why don’t you live with me and Mom and Dad?” She asked innocently. Jeremy’s heart stopped, and he opened his mouth. 

 

“Because I live with my dad.” He said, wondering when his mouth had gotten so dry. “And your- our mom doesn’t like my dad anymore. Or-“ Before he could say ‘or me,’ a voice called from downstairs. 

 

“Jeremy! Esther! Dinner!” Garrett seemed to be standing at the bottom of the stairs, and Jeremy stood up quickly. Esther was suitably distracted, racing downstairs. Jeremy followed her less excitedly, feeling his stomach clench. He hadn’t had a sit down dinner in ages, not since the one time him and Jake went to Sbarro’s, which he really didn’t think counted. 

 

There were fucking placemats. And silverware laid out on napkins. And a centerpiece of flowers. Jesus Christ, when did his mom become a pinterest mom? When she’d lived with him and his dad, she barely cared about anything other than herself and how she looked and how Jeremy made her look in public.

 

Jeremy awkwardly sat next to Esther, which meant he was sitting right across from Maria. He contented himself with staring down at his bowl, which wasn’t glamorous, thank god. He assumed it was whatever Esther liked, which seemed to be spaghetti of some sort. With, of all things, shrimp. 

 

Garrett bent his head over his bowl, and for a moment, Jeremy was wholly confused. Then he started to pray. And it sure as hell wasn’t a Jewish prayer. He could feel his mother eyeing him, and he bent his head quickly, folding his hands. 

 

When he looked up again, she was obviously biting back a retort about how his father was raising him without manners. 

 

There was awkward silence, before Garrett broke the silence. “So, uh, Maria told me you were in a play. You like acting?” 

 

_ Actually, no, I mostly joined the play to get the attention of a girl I like, because while I do like acting, Christine was a priority. And I also accidentally ruined the play because a supercomputer pill in my brain told me to spread its hivemind to the entire school.  _ “...yeah, I like acting.”

 

Garrett nodded. Jeremy was kind of starting to like the guy— he seemed nice, if a bit of a pushover. He supposed that was his mom’s type. But if she left Esther like she left him— he was jerked out of his train of thought as Garrett continued speaking. “I’m more of a football guy myself.”

 

And, before Jeremy could even stop himself, the words were coming out of his mouth. “Oh, cool, my boyfriend plays football.” With that one word, he could feel his mother’s glare on him. Shit, don’t mention the boyfriend in front of your homophobic mother. 

 

There was silence for a bit, before Esther, sweet, little Esther, broke the silence. “You’ve got a boyfw- boyfrrrriend?” She emphasized the ‘r’ as if searching for her mother’s approval. 

 

“That’s not proper grammar, Esther.” Maria said, and Jeremy wanted to smack her. Esther was five, for God’s sake, not ten. She probably had barely started kindergarten. Her next sentence made Jeremy want to smack her even more. “I thought you would have stopped hanging around that Mell boy.”

 

Jeremy felt his blood boil. When his mother had left, Michael had just come out to people who were close to him— which she had evidently overheard him saying how he was gay. “I didn’t. But he isn’t my boyfriend.”

 

There was silence for a bit, and Jeremy saw Esther staring at him out of the corner of his eye. Garrett, on the other hand, put a hand on Maria’s. “Maria—“ But she pulled her hand away. 

 

“Jeremiah, I thought you were over this.” She said, sounding frustrated. As if she had any control over his life. And inside him, the little boy still afraid of his mother’s disapproval died. He didn’t care. This woman was not his fucking mother anymore.

 

“What are you doing?” He snapped, making Maria glare at him, opening her mouth to protest. “No, really, who the fuck are you trying to be? Stop pretending you know me!”

 

“Jeremiah-“

 

“My name is Jeremy!” His hands were shaking. “Did you tell him what you did to me?” He gestured at Garrett with his fork. 

 

“Maria, what is he talking about?” God, Jeremy almost felt bad for the poor guy. He’d gotten roped into a marriage with her, and he barely knew anything.

 

“You didn’t tell him?” Jeremy said incredulously. Of course she hadn’t. Nothing like telling your new husband that you abused your last kid for no reason other than being an entitled bitch.

 

“Mom-“ Esther started, looking confused, and Jeremy felt sorry for her. She didn’t deserve this bitch of a mother. 

 

“And you’re already doing it to Esther. You’re trying to make her a perfect kid, aren’t you? Stop her voice issues, sign her up for sports, make her feel awful about herself if she doesn’t do things right, right?” Garrett’s face went white, and he knew he was on to something. It made him want to vomit. “And you’re going to start doing to her what you did to me. I just- I hope it doesn’t last as long.” He spat. 

 

“Jeremiah, I won’t have you talk like this—“ Her eyes were narrowed at him, and he was struck with a realization. That was who the Squip had sounded like. The voice was Keanu Reeves, but the tone was all Maria Heere.

 

Jeremy shot to his feet. “No! I’m done letting you tell me what to do! I’m not going to just obey you blindly.” He turned to Garrett, looking pleadingly at him. “She didn’t tell you why she left, did she?”

 

To the other man’s credit, he didn’t show his confusion openly, but it was pretty obvious that he was incredibly confused. “Of course she did. Her and your father didn’t see eye to eye on how to raise you—“

 

“Because she fu-“ He glanced at Esther. “Because she hit me!” 

 

It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. All eyes were on Jeremy, Esther and Garrett’s dark ones and Maria’s bright blue ones. 

 

“Yeah, she didn’t tell you that, did she?” Jeremy’s voice was shaking, and he forced down the urge to cry. He would not give her the satisfaction. “How if I was anything less than perfect, then I’d get hit.”

 

“It was a disciplinary tac-“ Maria started, but he could tell that she was already uncomfortable, and Garrett was looking at her with a sort of confused horror on his face.

 

“Discipline? Telling your six year old that he’s the reason you’re upset and that he should learn how to suck it up when he’s having a panic attack because he’s scared of you is  _ discipline _ ?” 

 

Esther’s voice was quiet. “Mom-“

 

“Esther, go to your room.” Garrett said quickly. “I’m sure it’s gonna be okay, alright?” 

 

“It’s fine, Garrett. I’m leaving.” Jeremy pushed his chair back, before turning to Esther. “Hey, Es. I’m sorry.” He said quietly, before gently ruffling the little girl’s hair. Esther looked like she was about to cry. “Stay safe, kiddo.” Then he shot a glare over his shoulder at Maria, turning on his heel and storming out. 

 

Before he got too far down the driveway, Garrett came out after him, grabbing his shoulder. Jeremy froze, expecting to be told off for yelling at his wife, but he only felt a piece of paper being slipped into his hand. “My phone number. I know you’re right.” Those words were not what Jeremy expected, but they were a nice surprise. “If I ever need someone to watch Esther, would you be able to? Or someone trustworthy? I’m not sure…” He glanced over his shoulder. Jeremy got the point. He wouldn’t trust her either, after hearing about that.

 

Jeremy’s fist closed around the paper, and he nodded silently. Then he saw Maria in the door, and he nodded at her. “Y-You should get back inside.”

 

Garrett nodded, sticking out his hand and shaking Jeremy’s. “You’re a good kid.” Then he turned around and walked away, and Jeremy made a break for Michael’s car. 

 

Michael seemed extremely confused. Evidently, he’d gone for a snack run, judging by the partially melted blue slushie in Jeremy’s cupholder and the empty sushi container. “How’d it go?”

 

Jeremy looked down at the note in his shaking hand, the scrawled numbers on it, and looked up at Michael, giving a small bitter smile. “I think I just got a babysitting job.”

**Author's Note:**

> I LOVE ESTHER HEERE WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL
> 
> also some background deere and michael being a bro is my aesthetic
> 
> but yeah basically maria heere is a bitch and i vote that we burn her
> 
> i may write more with esther if she’s received well!! comment if you want to see more of her!
> 
> stay safe and stay wonderful, loves!!
> 
> ~percy


End file.
